What Male Dating Profiles are Doing Wrong

Some guys might be wondering if there’s anything wrong with their profiles that are causing the lack in lady traffic or responses. Since I’ve been browsing profiles for a few years now I believe I have seen just about everything and might be able to point out some improvements.

Don’t: The profile that only has group pictures. I understand if you’re a guy who doesn’t like taking selfies or perhaps you’re trying to show how social you are. But if your profile only consists or 2 or 3 group pictures, chances are I’m not going to know which one is you. Due to the uncertainty or the effort required on my part to now do some investigative work and figure out if you’re the cute one or no, I’ll probably just swipe left. (Chances are you weren’t the cute one anyway).

Instead: Do a mix of group and solo shots. This way we know exactly who to be looking for and we also know other people like hanging out with you.

Don’t: The shirtless pictures. I mean I understand that gym/ cross fit fad going on and you’re showing off your results and how hip you are but come on man. I’ll either think you’re shallow or you hook up with someone who is shallow. Why don’t we let your muscles be an added bonus once we met?

Instead: Of course, if you’re just here to hook up then keep the picture, a girl will want to know what she’s working with. The only acceptable shirtless picture is one from the beach because it’s more nature and less staged to show off.

Don’t: Posing with Cars/Car pictures. If the picture is just of the car then you’re just flashing your money and you’re going to attract girls who only want your money. Or this is your project car and you’re a hobby mechanic in which these girls will have to know that car is your mistress. I’m not entirely sure that posing with the car is any better. Sure at least you’re in the picture and you could maybe make the argument that you’ve not showing off your muscle car but trust me, you don’t look cool leaning against the hood with your arms folded nor stretched out..

Instead: Maybe just include a line in your bio how you would love to take your date on a drive or how working on cars is one of your hobbies.

Don’t: The next issue could be from your bio. The two biggest issues are when a guy makes demands and when he’s very negative. Requirements like ‘short girls only’ or ‘no drama queens’ will most likely not give you the results you hope for. For starters, you limit your pool and seem shallow. Secondly, you seem like you don’t respect girls or can’t take responsibility for your own actions. There’s either a reason you have a crazy ex or you’re just making up the fact that she’s crazy.

Instead: You can get away with comments like “redheads are my weakness” and the like but stay away from close minded demands and requirements. Also don’t trash talk girls while trying to talk to a girl.. Just say positive things you are looking for in a girl like down to earth, fun, or loves to just chill on the couch.

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37 comments

  1. Ah, if only it were so simple! I’ve long wondered about this and been stumped; what does make a good male profile? I’ve coincidentally followed your advice for a while now with limited results; sounds like I need a bad 90’s-movie makeover montage and some glamour shots taken by a photographer friend!

    I’ve shared a few of my thoughts about my own profile (and lack of matches) at https://diaryofadatingdad.wordpress.com/2017/07/06/picture-me-this/

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yeah I should have added, your profile could be just about perfect and if the right woman for you doesn’t see it then you just end up with a few lackluster conversations. I absolutely must check out your article, Im so curious!! Have you done an article on what you look for in a woman’s profile?

      Liked by 3 people

  2. Interesting post but I must say from experience that there is no “One Size Fits All” online dating profile. I am currently in a long-term relationship with someone I met online. He only had one photo on his page and it was blurry. My page started with “Do Not Message Me If…”, but voila here we are! I believe it’s more timing and keeping your page true to you than anything else.

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    1. You’re definitely right, there are many different people and personalities that fill up this world and we all have different interests! I’ve deeply considered something along the same lines as “Do Not Message Me” lol. I think Love is a pretty funny thing and it doesn’t always come how or when you expect, which makes it even better honestly and Im really glad you were able to find the right guy for you! Sound advice to always stay genuine to yourself!

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  3. This is great! Shirtless pics, scowling gym or bathroom selfies, the obsession with fish pics, the no drama or issues requests and as you said the group photos – all of it always made me swipe left

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Sage advice, except I tried it all during my internet dating debacle years ago. My profile met all the criteria required to more or less guarantee dates. Admittedly, I did go on dates, but the majority of women ignored me or just wasted my time. The quality of the dates I went on were very lacking in general.

    Unfortunately, it seems that you’re a very dateable girl in an ocean of time wasters and lovers of the aesthetic.

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    1. Yeah, I’ve been on plenty of rough dates myself. Ironically for a dating app, the majority of people on there probably aren’t all that dateable (i.e. trust issues, just got out of a long term relationship, don’t want to make a relationship a priority).

      hahh thats an amazing line, thanks Paul!

      Like

      1. I hear you there. I stumbled across so many profiles where they said they were fresh out of a relationship and it’s like, come on! Let the dust settle! People are just so desperate not to be alone nowadays that they’re prepared to settle for anyone and then deal with the consequences later. If only people used their brains for thinking as opposed to their heart or loins…

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      2. omg I went on a date with a guy who had just gotten out of a 3 year relationship earlier THAT month?! Why can’t people just be single for a while and not go wasting people’s time just because they crave attention? hahah using their brains makes too much sense

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      3. It really is daft. I mean I suppose I hit the internet dating scene too soon after my relationship ended back in the day, but the circumstances weren’t as cut and dried as us having been together, breaking up, and then me getting straight onto the dating scene. It’s a very long and dirty story. I may even blog about it one day. In retrospect, I would have waited to sign up for it, but I was younger and less brain-engaged than I am now.

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  5. Sometimes guys have their profile edited by a female friend, who thinks she knows how to attract other women to him. Too bad it does not attract HER to him. Shouldn’t that say something?
    Or guys help guys create profiles, using stereotypes of women they believe to be true.
    One way or another, I believe one should stay true to themselves. That will cut the BS out, lessen the wasted time, and increase the chances of actually finding a somewhat compatible match.

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    1. Well usually friends would organically become something more if they’re attracted to each other so I guess I’m not surprised a female friend redoing a male profile would suddenly make her like him.
      Haha I feel like you can totally tell when a guy got help from his male friends on his profile.

      Like

  6. My biggest pet peeve about guys’ profiles is when they have hats or sunglasses on in every single picture. Put up at least 2 clear head shots! If I can’t see what you like, I’m swiping left no matter what.

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    1. hahah i don’t know why this makes me laugh but it does. #secretagentmode. I totally agree though, if I can’t see you clearly then I’m not even putting in the effort – exactly what I meant in my group picture paragraph.

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