History says I’ll end us

We’ve started something so pure and good here

I’m scared I’ll ruin it

The same way I usually do with all the others before you

I’m so scared of being vulnerable

Of getting hurt

Of opening up to you only to be disgarded

So I’ll push you away before Id let you in

Find some reason that this can’t work out

Because I’m so scared of what would happen if it is everything I’ve hoped for

If you’re right for me and I’m good to you

I’m scared to love you because I don’t know if I’d be strong enough to keep you.

And losing you would hurt far worse than never having the chance to love you.

-Aug 2017

 

13 comments

  1. i was musing about my mountain of past relationships just this morning. Then I fondly thought about the one I’m in now, and have been in for almost two decades. Why has it lasted? It’s lasted because I had all the dud relationships. I learned from them. I felt how I felt, and made new choices. I realized I didn’t like that pain at all, so what would I like better, and how would I find myself in this new place?

    1) Take new better informed chance(s)
    2) Equip myself with newer more enlightened tools
    3) Be willing to fail forward

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha mountain, I love it. It’s so important to reflect and be aware of what type of person your ending up with and how the relationship is being conducted in order to make changes in the future. That is absolutely amazing advice!!! Thank you so much for sharing, you’ve touched me today

      Liked by 2 people

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