closure

Sleepless

I’m sleeping just fine

while I’m probably on your mind

still keeping you up.

And you’re mad at yourself

for giving a damn

now that I’m gone.

And you’re mad at yourself

for not giving enough of a damn

back when I would have given you

my whole world

if that’s what you wanted.

But now I don’t care about what you want

You can tell it all to the ghost of mine

that still haunts when you can’t sleep.

Stuck on You

Maybe one day I’ll finally get good at getting over you

But until then I’ll have another drink while I listen to another song that reminds me of you

I’ll drive by your house again and read through old phone conversations

Oh cause one day you wont cross my mind

But until then I’m still at this bar, stuck on you

I imagine hearing your name and not giving it a second thought

There will be no floods of memories that have to be fought

No ache in my heart nor tears in my eyes

You’ll be gone and I’ll have moved on

But until then I’m still at this bar, stuck on you.

How to help your partner through tough times

In life, you face a lot of struggle. You might grieve a lost loved one, lose a job, or face a dispute with a friend. Fortunately, you usually have people in your life you can lean on including your partner. Tragedy affects everyone differently so if this is the first time you’re helping your partner through something, you might not know the best way to comfort them.

 

Let Them Know You’re There

There can be a lot of thoughts rushing through their head at this time, they may feel that expressing their feelings are a burden for you or they might be so consumed that they haven’t thought of you to lean on. So you let them know you’re there for them offering support in any way they want or need. You’re ready for when they want to talk. You’re a shoulder and open ear.

 

Read the Room

Some people want to talk out their issues, others prefer to silently work through things on their own. You may think how you’d react during this hard time and may think you know what’s best for your partner. But they may deal with their grief in a different way then you do. Keep an open mind to this and try to not take it personally if they are keep their emotions close to their chest. Don’t project your own ideals onto them and don’t push them for what they’re not ready for.

 

Validate their Feelings

Writing things down on paper or talking out your concerns is a good healing process for the soul. Sometimes you just need to vent or cry or scream – you just want to be heard. So validate your partner’s feelings. There doesn’t always need to be a solution or plan of action. Be a soundboard as they navigate through this new territory.

 

Know it’s always an ongoing process after losing a loved one.

Losing a loved one will hit you in new and unsuspecting ways. A tv show, a street sign, a song could all bring memories rushing back even after time has passed. The loss will still ache whether it’s years or months. Anniversaries and special holidays will always be tender for your partner. There is no start and end to this healing process, it will ease both of your minds to accept this. Just because there are tears today does not mean there will be tears tomorrow, so don’t worry or judge when you’re having a hard day. You will always remember them because they are always with you.