I’m memorizing every piece of you
I don’t mean to scare you or be rude
they just keep me company while you are gone.
I can play back a moment or conversation
and you go from my mind to right in front of my eyes
Your scent will linger in every memory
from the watch you wear
to the way your hands feel in my hair,
you’ll haunt me long after you’ve truly gone.
It’s still dark out and I didn’t sleep too well
So I’m awake and all emotional over you
Angry that I’m feeling so much when you never felt enough
I have to let this severed piece bleed out and finally die.
Because I’ve been cutting it
only to restitch and rebandage the hurt.
So I’ll take my half of the blame
If you finally quit playing this game
Because I don’t know if I’ll survive
another time with you calling out my name.
This reunion
isn’t as I imagined it would be.
I knew I’d changed
over the past 3 years
but I forgot that you could too.
I’ve built fantasies from past memories
But all I have to show for it
is a disappointing reality.
-Sept 2019
