relationships

What to Get Your Significant Other for the Holidays?

Some Significant others are hard to shop for whether they’re selfless, minimalist, or some other reason. The best way to get around this is to buy them some type of experience. By that, I mean an event or date you two can do together. This way you’ve shown your love by paying for something and you know they’ll enjoy it because they always enjoy spending time with you.

Event ideas: sporting tickets, plays, cooking classes, paint night, and concerts.

Maybe you’re not really the romantic type and you view the holidays as the one time need to really show your SO how much you truly love them. Attention to detail is important here, your SO wants to know you cherish every memory together just like they do. Think back to when you first meet, the date, the place, any inside jokes or little details you can recall.

Romantic route: engraved necklace with anniversary date or other significance, framed photo of the two of you

I talk about online dating quite a lot, there’s a good chance if you’re a new couple then you met through a dating app. This is a tech savvy generation and it would be no surprise if your SO wants one of the new tech product or accessories coming out.

Tech products: iPad, camera, or speakers (add a personal touch by customizing a case for your significant other)

Something I love is listening to my Boyfriend talk about his passions. The spark in his eye and the child like excitement when he really starts getting into such a topic is so fun for me. The joy radiates off him and even I start to get excited, like a puppy when family walks in the door. Buying something related to your SO’s passion or hobby will give them at that excitement and they will cherish the fact that you pay attention to the things they care about.

Something for their hobby: sporting equipment, seasons of their favorite tv show, art supplies, signed collectables item, or cook book

The last suggestion is not that original but it’s hard to go wrong here. With the cold months approaching they might be lacking some proper attire. It’s practical, functional, and stylish to get winter clothes for your SO. Plus you can pair it with a winter date idea like ice skating or a ski trip. It’s a cute way to introduce the date idea and give them something tangible to open besides tickets to an event.

Apparel for a cute winter date: hats, scarves, gloves, and shoes/boots/slippers

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I Love That Smile

Chest to chest, cheek to cheek

I see that spark in your eye

that let’s me know you’re up to no good.

The corner of your lips hold a secret

that I want to coax out with the tip of my tongue.

Your fingers trace up my spine.

You taste so good I can’t help but sink

my teeth into you.

I look at the waves crashing

the shore and picture my hips rolling into yours.

When were together time gets measured in kisses

and there’s never enough of either.

-Aug 2017

Romance (A list of things you’ve done)

Kiss me overlooking the bay

Kiss me in the rain

Kiss my hand

My forehead

Open my car door

Whisper I missed you into my hair

Hold me tight

Ask about my family

Listen closely to my fears and insecurities

Spark passion into my future

Tenderly handle every piece of myself I hand to you

Love me

-Aug 2017

When I Say I Miss You…

I say I miss you

but it’s not exactly what I mean.

Yes I do miss the way the corner of your lips smile

and those ridiculous jokes you love telling

But I’ve begun to use those words as a placeholder.

I mean more than I miss you while you’re gone

My heart aches for you even while you stand right before me.

‘I love you’ is on the tip of my tongue

but fear holds a hand over my mouth

and I settle for ‘I miss you’ yet another time.

-Sept 2017

Signs He Really Likes You

Back over the summer I wrote an article about when a guy isn’t into you, now I want to talk about when a guy IS into you. I must admit, it should be very obvious so if you’re reading this because you’re not sure then whether he likes you or not, he doesn’t like you as much as you deserve. But anyways, first:

He tells you how he feels (like I said, super obvious). He’ll tell you how happy he is when he’s with you, he’ll compliment your humor, personality, talents, and looks, and he’ll text you randomly saying how something reminded him of you and he had to let you know.

Of course, some fu*kboys are all talk and will tangle your heart with words about ‘our future’ and ‘what will we name our babies’. But then they only want to hang out at 3AM after they went out partying with their ‘boys’. If he really likes you, he wants to spend time with you wherever he can. He wants to take you to dinner, to a concert or park, on the couch in sweatpants, and to the diner for pancakes. Morning or night, sober or drunk, fancy event or ripped sweats, he wants to see all of you because he values you much more than a late night ego boost. There’s no game of waiting for the weekend to go out to the bars, he’ll text you Wednesday night to come watch Survivor or make a late night Diary Queen shake run.

You’ll spend a lot of time just the two of you but he will also make plans so that you can meet his friends/family. You will not be kept secret or hidden. Instead he wants to make sure other people in his life get to meet this awesome girl who’s been making him smile at his phone like a goon all the time. He wants to integrate you into his life, not separate you.

Lastly, is the signs of his emotional investment in you:

When he really likes you he wants to remember all the information and little details you tell him. He’ll ask about your family, your favorite TV shows, which foods you’re addicted to. He wants to remember how you take your coffee so he can surprise you with a cup just because.

Whether he’s buying you jewelry or just a random coffee at Starbucks, he’s wanting to give you things that will make you happy. Aside from the financial part of buying a gift, there’s also the emotional load of picking out a gift, debating between colors and options, and the stressful nerves wondering if he’s picked the right present to impress and please you.

But aside from the little details, he also wants to know the deep and heavy stuff too. Not every day can be good and fun, but he’s going to stick around anyway. He’ll ask for embarrassing stories, sad memories, and your fears about the future. He wants to hear about the crappy days and comfort you however he can. He’s emotionally invested and your comfort and happiness are important to him.

You deserve love and you deserve someone who can give you the type of love you want.

How to Handle Your Family Meeting Your Significant Other

With the holidays coming up, this might be the first family gathering your significant other will attend. Drunk grandpas, loud aunts, and unfiltered kids you have no idea what’s going to come out of their mouth next or what crazy thing they might do under the watch of a fresh pair of eyes. Will your significant other feel awkward and come off cold and distant? Will their vibrant personality rub some cousins the wrong way?

There are pros and cons of having a significant other meet family during a large gathering. Parties usually have various small groups or couples chatting together throughout the area which can help keep your SO from feeling too overwhelmed and you might be able to dodge any troublesome relatives. Even with a large group, the attention might not be all on your SO since parties are always a good time for people to catch up with others they haven’t seen in a while and others outside the family could be invited as well.

Of course, you are still throwing your SO into a sea of strangers with loud chatter and music. A smaller gathering of just immediate family or a quiet dinner might be less stressful on the senses for your SO. There won’t be tons of faces and names to remember, family relationship links to keep track of, nor an endless string of stories to listen to with characters you don’t know.

Either way it’s important to talk to your partner and see what they’re comfortable with and how you’ll best be able to management the stress of a new dynamic. Just remember, no matter how embarrassing or overbearing your family might be, everyone is nervous. It’s totally normal to be nervous and probably won’t end up being as bad as you think.

And if it is, well at least there’s no where to go but up from here!