How to make sure you get a second date

Have you been on 50 first dates but can’t seem to get to the second? Figure out what you’ve been doing wrong.


Don’t rush the first date

I’ve seen it all too many times on dating apps, guys rushing to meet up that night or maybe two nights later. You barely even know me! And i definitely don’t know you! Whatever day of the week you start talking don’t make plans for that weekend, wait for the following one. Plus its good to find out how they like to spend their weekends and how engaged they stay with you while they’re not bored at work.


Weekday Date

Speaking of weekend dates, they’re probably harder to score since weekends are considered more valuable to workers. You only really have two nights to hang out with friends or visit that cool new spot everyone is talking about. You’d be really bummed to waste a night on a guy that’s a total dud. Your date will be more willing to accept your date proposal if its on a weekday. Wednesday or Thursday would be most ideal since they’ll feel a weight lifted on humpday and how the weekend is another step closer. The less stressed they are, the better it is for you.


Stand Out

In the modern dating world you can’t settle for a simple dinner and a movie anymore. There are too many other options for your date to choose besides you so you need to make an impression and quick! There’s no need to go all out or get too fancy. But you want to try to get creative and cater the date to something you know they like. This shows that you’re paying attention and are able to put people before yourself by not just picking something you want to do.


Stop Talking about Yourself

Everyone loves to talk about themselves. Most conversations are people sharing their side of a similar experience. You’re so focused on waiting to tell them your story that you’re not even really LISTENING. Stop talking about you and ask more about them. The better you listen and remember the more impressed they’ll be. You’ll also gain a better understanding of who they are and can decide if they are a good fit for you.


Don’t Go too Fast

As I’ve mentioned before you can go at whatever speed (first kiss link) is working for you and your date. But if you’re looking for a long term relationship, the general rule of thumb is to not move too fast. If you’re constantly putting your hand on his thigh or sticking your tongue down her throat then they might think you’re just looking for short term. Being gentle and respectful is a good way to show you’re ready to start a relationship


Plan the Second Date

It’s usually a good idea to mention the second date while on the first. You may be talking about a shared activity you both enjoy and that would be the perfect time to mention “awesome, that’s what we can do next time”. It’s best to mention a second date near the end of the first though because by then you will have both grown more comfortable with each other and can gauge if the chemistry and compatibility is there.



  1. The thing is, everyone is different when it comes to first date timing.

    Sometimes women actually prefer it to be that night or two nights later. Otherwise, they’ll assume you’re not interested or assertive enough. Or they simply feel that chemistry and spark is best determined in person over drinks, rather than wasting time messaging back and forth. Plus, if you don’t jump on things right away, you risk another guy swooping in and ruining your chance. That’s happened to me a few times.

    On the other hand, some women will shut down if you ask within that time frame because they’d rather talk for several days or several weeks first. Some also want to have a phone conversation, or even Skype/Facetime in more extreme cases before you can ask for a date. So you can ask her out thinking it’s been long enough, but it’s actually too soon. Then you can ask her out wondering if it’s too soon, and it turns out you’re too late. The trick is figuring out which type you’re talking to.


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